Moving On.....

So I am a Gemini. The twins. The ying and the yang. And I definitely have two very distinct sides to me.....
One is the "outgoing, social, speak my mind, there for everyone, how can I help" side.
The other is the "need my space, crave the quiet, block out the world, get lost in a book or some great music, let me recharge in peace" side.

I live equally, and seemlessly, in both sides of my personality. Moving back and forth without warning or preamble. I make my way through life by pulling from my strengths and sometimes hiding behind my weaknesses. I am divinely human.

I originally started this blog to be an outlet for my thoughts and an encouragement for others. Over the years its focus, my focus, has ebbed and flowed, based on where I was on my life's journey. During this past season of life I was processing my experiences much more internally. I tried to blog a few times, but the "social" side of my personality was not finding the words to express what my "need my space" side was dealing with.

But.....it appears that season has passed. I have been thinking about blogging again. Almost craving the creative and theraputic outlet it gives me. I have heard from a few that they miss reading the twisted musings of my mind. I also am praying that the divine intervention, inspiration and wisdom that My Creator pours out through my quiet times with Him will once again find its way to encourage and ignite both you and me, as I share my thoughts and experiences.

So..... What season are you coming out of? What might the next season hold for you? Just as winter's long dormant, resting phase eventually makes way for spring's renewal and growth, so must our lives go through seasons of metamorphosis and rebirth. Who have you been and who are you becoming?

My prayer for today is that we each, in our our unique and individual ways, recognize and appreciate the seasons we have been through. I pray we invite the joys and sorrows, the triumphs and the failures, of our next season. I pray we find time to be alone in the silence and time to share in the community of fellow believers. Here's to a new season, a new road, a new vision, mission and values to lead our lives!

Until We Meet Again,
Drea

Who Am I When I'm Not Who I Am?

The last seventeen years of my life have been about two things: being a wife and being a mother. I now find myself without a tan line on my left ring finger and an all too quiet house every other week. For a girl that is accustomed to lots of activity and commotion in her world, I find myself rather unnerved at the change in my schedule and, more so, in my identity.

Everyone wishes they had a little more time to themselves, some peace and quiet, a chance to do what they want to do. But the phrase "Be careful what you wish for, cause you just might get it" really is true. Here I sit on a quiet summer day, windows open, listening to the birds, working on my computer in a clean and peaceful house. And I am feeling lost.

Being "Mom" is the most rewarding, precious, challenging, and blessed part of my life. When I am separated from my children I feel like a fish out of water, flopping around and gasping for the refreshing water that gives me life and purpose. Now don't get me wrong, there have been times when I have not fully embraced the "joys" of motherhood and I know there will be times in the future when I will not quite revel in the "bliss" of mothering three energetic and independent children. BUT, over-all, on average, and in this moment when I am by myself, I can appreciate and delight in the moments when I am able to completely focus on my children.

I'm guessing I am not the only mother that feels this way. Some have been separated from their children by divorce and some for other reasons. Some separations happen by choice and some are forced upon us. Some separations are positive and healthy while others are painful and not welcome. Heck, what I'm talking about it not exclusive to just mothers either. Each one of us has experienced separation from someone we love. We have felt the loss of someone we dearly loved and have had to wrestle with the emotions of picking up the pieces and moving on without them. Maybe we only need to get through a few days without them, maybe a week, a month, a year or a lifetime. But we all know what it is like to find ourselves facing a reflection that is familiar yet somehow different.

How do we move forward and recreate ourselves? How do we spend energy on redefining who we are without completely loosing who we were? How do we begin to grapple with the notion that we are still the same person, just different? How do we surrender all the control we think we have in the situation and give it over to the One that can truly give us life and purpose?

Who Am I video:


The beautiful thing is that even when I am not sure Who I Am, God does. He has a plan for my life and I know that because in Jeremiah 29:11 He tells me so... "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

So..... really, I can relax and stop trying to figure it all out. Instead I need to let go and allow God to lead and guide my life, my schedule and my identity. I need to spend time, daily, more like hourly, with the One that can comfort and soothe my soul. I need to remember that life is a process and I will be reinvented many times over. I need to not become so attached to one station that I am unwilling to grow and develop in a new area. I need to remember that I am not on this journey alone and I need to be honest and open with myself and with the angels God has placed on the path with me.

My prayer for today is that I will be comfortable with Who I Am. I pray that I will embrace who I have been and who I will become. I pray that I will forgive myself and accept God's forgiveness, through Christ Jesus. I pray that I will be open to God's work in my life. I pray that I will be the Mom AND the Woman I am called to be. I pray that I will experience a oneness with my Creator that enables me to know I am of value, have a purpose and belong because I Am His. I pray that you will believe and experience all this too!

Until We Meet Again,

Drea

When Life Throws You a Curve Ball.....

.....take a swing at it and see where it lands.

I have never been a big fan of baseball, the pace is too slow and the players get paid WAY too much. But over the course of the last six months I have learned to reexamine life and take a second look at things I thought I had already made up my mind about. Maybe I could learn a few things from the "All-American Sport." (Oh boy, you KNOW my life has changed in a big way if I'm about to go with a baseball metaphor!)

Lesson 1: Slow Pace - I came charging into this world at 3:13 am on the day I was born. I could not wait to get my day started. My Mother says I have not slowed down since. I try to pack more things into one day than most people try to do in a week. For a long time I thought it meant I was being "productive, efficient, in control" but now I'm beginning to wonder. I wonder what I am trying to prove. I wonder what I am trying to accomplish. I wonder what I am trying to hide from. I wonder what I am afraid of.

When life moves at a Slow Pace you are able to experience every moment of the world around you. You have to face reality and wrestle with it. You have time to observe, time to evaluate, time to process and time to make a wise choice.

God knows, all too well, that I am in desperate need of all of that!

Lesson 2: Getting Paid To Do What You Love - Now I still think those MLB guys bring home a disgusting sum of money in the face of world poverty, local homelessness and individual economic challenges, BUT it is not their fault. They are just fortunate enough to get paid to do what they love. I bet the majority of them would still play ball even if they had their salary cut in half. Sure there are some of them that are in it for the money but more often than not the "Boys of Summer" feel blessed to just walk out on that field everyday.

Have you ever experienced that? Being able to do what you love, truly love, and maybe you were even lucky enough to be compensated for it. Do you know the pleasure of using your gifts and talents in a way that brings you joy and gives God the glory? Have you ever said "...and they are paying me to do this!" Or have you ever thought "...they don't even need to pay me, I just love this so much."

So... here I sit, facing down a spinning curve ball that is flying my way. Am I going to take my own "advice"? Have I learned that it is more important to take it slow, and do what God has gifted me to do? Am I ready to give up the control and surrender in the way that will enable me to release my white knuckle grip and swing through a hit that sends that curve ball out of the park?

My prayer for today is that I have listened to my coach (God) and my teammates (friends and family); that I am prepared to use the blessings I have been given in a way that will bring Heaven a little closer to Earth. I pray that I can release my plan for God's plan, even if I don't fully know what that is yet. I pray that when I slow down I will see things that God sees. I pray that when I do what I love it will be a reflection of what God loves. I pray that when I get to the 7th inning stretch I will be pleased with how I played the first part of the game and I will be energized to finish strong. I pray that YOU are willing and able to join me in the game. The game of life where you will be thrown curve balls, sliders, and knuckle balls; all of which you will be prepared to rocket over the outfield wall through the strength Christ Jesus has placed in you.

Until We Meet Again,

Drea

Take the Time To Look Around

Last night I had the awesome privilege of speaking to our middle and high school students at church. The message was on taking time to PAUSE and BREATHE. God was all over the evening and many of us, students and adults alike, felt His presence and peace with us. What a Blessing!

Once I was home and snuggled in my bed I began to think back over some of the highlights of my day. The joy expressed by the kids as they watched the first snow of the season fall. The spark of learning ignited in a 2nd grader at school. The peace and quiet of my Mother's house when I visited her in the afternoon. The honest and courageous friendships shared by so many at student ministries. Being on the receiving end of multiple acts of kindness throughout the day. The tasty stuffed green olives and delicious fudge on the staff treat table at work.

As I sat there thinking I realized that in the moment I had breezed passed each of these events and did not acknowledge their significance or importance in my life. I had appreciated them and enjoyed them but I was not present in each of the moments to the degree that I allowed them to change my life.

Even as I was in the midst of praying throughout my day about my message for the students, I was still missing the point. I was too busy thinking forward and looking backward to be aware of my need to Look Around Me. How often do we live past events over and over in our mind? How often do we prepare and plan for what is going to happen next? We spend so much of our time in the past and in the future that we totally forget to LIVE IN THE MOMENT.

This is a hard concept any time of year, but it seems especially hard during the busy holiday season. This time of year is supposed to be about showing love to those you care about and remembering the sacrificial love of our One True God, who sent His Only Son so that we may have Life in Him. And here we are rushing through our day; busy at work, quick stop at the mall, dinner on the fly, drop one kid off at the library and pick another one up from practice, make an appearance at that holiday party, rush through your greeting cards so you can get them in the mail, and finally drop into bed, exhausted, thinking about what needs to be done tomorrow.

But what if we pushed the PAUSE button and soaked in the beauty and the majesty of each of those moments? What if we slowed down and noticed the stressed co-worker next to us and were able to talk and pray with them about the struggle they are facing right now. What if we were the pleasant customer and made the sales clerk smile as we made our purchases. What if we sat as a family around the dinner table and shared our highs and lows from the day. What if we took those ten minutes in the car, as we shuttle them from place to place, to talk to our children, really find out how they are doing and what they are dealing with (before they get so overwhelmed that they think about taking it out on their classmates and teachers). What if we said "no" to a few of the party invitations we receive and select only a few to attend so that we can enjoy the true blessing of spending time with friends and family. What if we took the time to put a personal, handwritten message of gratitude and love in each of our holiday cards, letting the recipient know how much they mean to us. What if we fell into bed and praised God for having a roof over us and a soft place to lay our head.

So..... What moments have you been missing? How is life passing you by? How can you slow down and be fully present in each moment? What do you need to give up in order to be able to focus? Who do you need to tell that you appreciate and love them? When are you going to make time and space for God today?

My prayer for today is that we all stop looking ahead or behind us but instead spend time looking around us. I pray that when we pause we are able to see what Christ sees, a world that is broken and in need of love. I pray that we can find the joy and the serenity in each small moment we are a part of. I pray that through our obedience and faithfulness God is able to reveal new and wonderful things about Himself to us. I pray that each new experience will bring us closer to being the person Christ calls us to be.

Until We Meet Again,

Drea

Reconnecting and The Power of Prayer

WOW! Has it really been two weeks since I posted last?! Ya know, it has! I can tell. Life has been such a whirl-wind that I felt like I was not able to make time for this and I am sorry for that. I am sorry because this blog is one of the key ways that God helps me process what is going on in my life. He communicates with me and does a work in me as I share my thoughts and feelings. I am sorry I let "life" take over and allowed my connection with Him to be diminished.

It feels so good to Reconnect!

A quick update on Mom:
Mom is doing better, although she did fall in her apartment yesterday, she is feeling stronger every day. When I posted last I explained that she had been readmitted to the hospital. There was nothing "new" going on, they simply had released her too soon the first time. She needed more time to heal and recover. She spent three more days in the hospital and then came home. She is not a very good patient, so slowing down is not easy for her (guess I know where I get it from). I have been visiting her daily and she and I are enjoying our chance to reconnect and strengthen our relationship. Please continue to pray for her health and stamina. I firmly believe it was the collective hearts offered up in prayer that has helped Mom through the trials of the past month.

Speaking of the Power of Prayer... I am constantly amazed, never surprised, but deeply amazed at the overwhelming power that prayer can have in our lives. When we fully open our hearts to the loving hands of God, offer up our struggles and our joys, and humbly lay our lives at the feet of Jesus, the comfort and encouragement that are offered to us through prayer is outstanding!

I personally have been spending hours in prayer each day for the past few weeks. Praying for my Mother, my marriage, my children, my friends, my co-workers, for our community and our world. And each time I make the time to stop "thinking" and start praying about a situation, it makes all the difference. My perspective is altered, my mind is eased, and my heart is relieved. We all carry so much stress and anxiety over issues that we can not control. But when we are able to take those burdens off ourselves and give them over to God, really and truly offer them up to Him through prayer, then we finally release Him to work in our lives.

God is always there, ready and waiting to help us, provide for us, and comfort us. It is us, you and me, that get in the way and try to "fix" things ourselves, and usually end up making a bigger mess of it anyway. When we finally stop, drop to our knees (either literally or figuratively) and ask Christ to intercede in our lives, then the real work can begin. When we step aside and let the Power of the Trinity; the Father, Son and Holy Spirit, take hold of our lives then we are able to release our frail and flawed grip on whatever is happening in our world.

Reconnecting and the Power of Prayer go hand in hand. When we are not in communication with God then we are typically not offering our struggles up to Him. When we are not offering our struggles up to Him then we are stuck in our own muck, trying to figure it out for ourselves. When we rely on ourselves then we almost always make a mess of things. And if things get bad enough, maybe we cry out for help. But... when we are in communication with God, we realize our inability to handle all the challenges in life. We know that we can not make this journey on our own, and we enjoy the company of our spiritual companion. And when you enjoy someones company, you usually want to spend more time with them. And when we spend more time with our Heavenly Father, we are blessed in so many ways.

So..... How do you stay connected with God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit? Do you daily offer up your struggles AND your joys through prayer? Do you spend time in prayer for the other people that come in and out of your world? Do you believe that God works through and honors the humble requests we offer to Him through prayer? Is there something that you are trying to control that you need to release and offer up to Him right now?

My prayer for today is that we will know and experience God's presence in our lives. I pray that we stay connected with Him through prayer. I pray that we stay connected to each other by sharing our lives and offering each other up in prayer. I pray that God will rush in and radically change your heart and mind so that you can see and feel the love He has for you. I pray that when life gets overwhelming, we immediately ask for prayer. I pray that when life is good, we immediately offer up a prayer of thanksgiving. I pray that when we don't know what to make out of life, we immediately turn to Christ Jesus and ask for His intercession and love. I pray that today will be a day of peace and joy for you!

Until We Meet Again,

Drea

Update

Well, my life as an only child continues to be an interesting one ;)

My Mom was released from the hospital last Friday, only to be readmitted on Sunday evening. The Drs are running all kinds of tests to see what is going on so I am heading off to the hospital again early this morning to see what the results are.

God shows up in the time and space that we give Him, and my drives back and forth from the hospital have always been fruitful time between Him and I. Sometimes I spend my time in prayer, sometimes I listen to Life 102.5, sometimes I am talking with a friend. But no matter what I am doing, God shows up to provide me with encouragement, strength and love.

Now sure, there have been times when my own exhaustion or frustration have closed me off to what God is wanting to send me, but thankfully He loves me enough to push through my junk and get His message across.

Are there times when all you really needed was a dose of Jesus? Have you felt like the world is just too much and all you need is a Savior that can take it all from you? Do you sometimes wish your best friend was right next to you so you could laugh, scream, cry or just talk with them? I feel like that a lot!

So..... How can you make time for Jesus today? How can you be open, give Him the time and the space, to enter into whatever it is you have going on in your life? How can you surrender your "issues" to Him and let Him take care of you? How can you show Him that you trust Him with all that you have?

My prayer for today is that we all realize our need for a Savior, The Savior, and take the time to make Him Our Savior. I pray that whatever we are going through; the good, the bad and the ugly, that we are able to lay it down at His feet and honestly let Him take it for us. I pray that we are all open to God's healing Grace and His unending Love.

Until We Meet Again,

Drea

MIA

Sorry I have been Missing In Action this week. My Mother has been in the hospital and being an only child of a single mother that means I have been up there a lot.

I appreciate the prayers that so many of you have shared. It is a blessing to know that God has placed so many wonderful people into my life.

I pray that you have a healthy relationship with your parents. I know my Mom and I have not always been in such a good place. I pray that if you are hurting or struggling in a relationship, that you turn to God and your support network for strength, healing and encouragement. I know I would not have made it through this week with out God or my friends!

Please know that even though life has me otherwise occupied this week, you are all still in my thoughts and prayers and I can not wait to return next week with a renewed spirit and willingness to share our experiences together.

Until We Meet Again,

Drea